From: Kent Hovind
Sent: June 19, 2009
To: God
GOD: Good morning, Son.
KH: Morning? Lord, it’s the middle of the night!
GOD: This is about the only time I can get you quiet enough to listen, Son. I came to answer your prayer. You asked Me for wisdom on how to reach Kevin, Mark, and William, didn’t you?
KH: Yes, Lord. I pray for them often, but their public school education about evolution seems to have built a barrier to Your Word.
GOD: There is a barrier, Son. Let’s go visit I-3. Steve can answer your question. Try not to be frustrated with Steve. I’m trying to reach him too.
KH: What is I-3, Lord?
GOD: Let’s see if you can figure it out, Son. You like puzzles don’t you?
KH: Yes, Lord.
GOD: Good, let’s go…
KH: Wow! This place is beautiful! Beautiful flowers, trees, and rocks are everywhere! It looks like a tropical island.
GOD: It is, Son. That’s Steve down there by the beach. Enjoy your visit, Son.
KH: Ok, Lord…Excuse me, sir. I’m new here. Do you have a minute to talk?
Steve (ST): Sure! I’m Steve. I’ve lived here all my life and would be glad to answer any questions. How can I help?
KH: Well, first of all, where are we?
ST: This is I-3.
KH: What does I-3 stand for?
ST: No one I know remembers for sure, but it has to do with 3 words that start with “I.” We are pretty sure that one of them must be Island since we were a huge tropical island.
KH: What do you do?
ST: I’m a full time researcher for the king of the Island, King Charles.
KH: What kind of things do you research?
ST: Just about everything. The people here bring me all sorts of things they find in the jungle or on the beach, and I research it to determine how it formed. There is a very powerful volcano in the middle of the island that produces lots of lava, water, steam, ash, and rock. It supplies the energy to create many things. The wave action on the beach and the sunlight also provide energy. Between three sources of energy we can explain the formation of just about everything.
KH: What are you researching today?
ST: This strange container here. One of the people found it right here on the beach this morning, so they called me in to examine it. It’s a good thing they didn’t touch it before they called me. It appears to have some sort of liquid in it.
KH: It looks like a nearly empty plastic bottle of Coke to me. It is made in Atlanta, Georgia.
ST: Ha! That shows how much you have to learn. I’ve been over every square inch of I-3 and there is no such place here. King Charles assures us that everything can be explained by the forces right here on the island. He says nothing outside of our island exists, as far as life that is. We sent a ship to explore the little island you can see on the horizon out there but it is devoid of life. Over the years people have brought me all sorts of strange things and, so far, I’ve been able to explain them all with the material and forces on the island.
Now let me get my lab coat, glasses, and gloves on, and I’ll begin my research. Let’s see, one end of this “bottle,” as you call it, seems to be a different color.
KH: That’s the lid. It unscrews.
ST: Very interesting! If I turn it one way it comes off! Let me make a few notes in my book here. “Twisting counter-clockwise removes one end of the object. My previous research has shown me that when the volcano erupts the ash and steam clouds often spiral in the same direction. This is evidence that the volcano was involved in the production of this object.”
KH: Why don’t you just take my word for it that this thing was not made on the island? I’ve seen the place where it is made in Atlanta.
ST: I already told you there is no Atlanta. King Charles says everything can be explained by forces right here on I-3. He’s the king, and I work for him, so stop interrupting me, and I’ll figure this out. Let’s see, the rest of the object is clear and flexible. The glass produced by our volcano is normally dark, but clear glass can be produced. We often find it on the beach after people have large bonfires. That explains the fact that it is clear, but the flexible part may take some more research. Lava coming out of the volcano is quite fluid and slowly hardens. At some point it would also be soft like this, but it is way too hot to handle. This material is cool to the touch. I’ll ask the king for more research grant money to do a study on this feature.
KH: Does the king spend a lot of money on this type of research?
ST: Oh my! Yes! A large part of our budget on the island is devoted to research. We have huge museums full of artifacts that have been found, researched, and explained. These natural forces on the island can produce a wide range of objects. It’s amazing when you stop to think about it. You should tour the museum if you get time.
KH: Thanks, I’ll do that.
ST: Let’s see, back to my notes, “The object seems to be about the right size to fit a human hand. The outside has some sort of code or markings all over it.”
KH: It was designed to fit the hand, and that “code” is the label. It says, “Coke,” and also says where it was made.
ST: Ha! You have a lot to learn! Just because things look like they were designed does not mean they were. Our volcano and waves can produce some amazing things! Given enough time, of course.
KH: Of course. I bet Charles says it may take “millions of years” to make some of them, doesn’t he?
ST: Yes! How did you know that?
KH: Just a lucky guess. Actually, there is a law called The Law of Cause and Effect. Every object had a cause that created it.
ST: Exactly! That’s what King Charles says. I just have to determine if it was caused by the waves, sun, or volcano. It’s fun research. I love my job.
KH: Have you ever considered that there may be forces outside of the island that could be making these objects?
ST: No. Only the ignorant and superstitious would believe that! King Charles is a very intelligent man. He assures us that we have everything we need right here on the island. He employs a lot of intelligent people like me to examine objects and explain them for the masses. One of the basic rules of our research is, “There is nothing outside of our island. Everything can be explained right here.”
KH: What would happen if you disagreed with him about that?
ST: Oh my! I shudder to think of it! A few have done that over the years and they lost their job, retirement, grant money, prestige, and a few even had their degree from the university rescinded. I would never dare to disagree with King Charles! He has all the answers and determines who gets the money.
KH: You mentioned that he is very intelligent and he employs a lot of intelligent people to do research for him. Could one of the “I”s in I-3 stand for intelligent?
ST: I have thought of that before. I suppose it could. I’m very intelligent. There are lots of very intelligent people here. Maybe it is the Island of Intelligent…what could be the last word?
KH: I’ll work on that. So one of Charles rules of research is that there is nothing outside of the island that creates things. Is that right?
ST: That’s correct. So far he has been right on target. Some objects take more research than others to explain but that provides job security for me as well as lots of others like me. Now, if you will excuse me, I need to finish examining this strange object.
KH: OK, I’ll leave you to your “research.” I think I’ll go visit your museum. King Charles wouldn’t have a last name of “Darwin” would he?
ST: Yes! How did you know?
KH: Lucky guess. I read about a guy named that who created rules to limit research. If you ever get stumped on explaining something about this object, come see me. I’ll be glad to help.
GOD: Let’s go home, Son. Does that help?
KH: Yes, Lord. They start with the wrong assumption don’t they?
GOD: They do, Son. They don’t want to admit that there may be bigger forces off their little island that creates things. That might make them look small and silly. Have you figured out the puzzle, Son?
KH: I think so, Lord. Is it the Island of Intelligent Idiots?
GOD: Very good, Son. I told about those people in 2 Peter 3:3-7. They are “willingly ignorant” aren’t they?
KH: Yes, Lord. Thanks.
GOD: You are welcome, Son. Go back to bed now. I’ve got your back.
KH: But, Lord? What about reaching them?
GOD: Just keep showing them My creation and My law. Some will eventually believe.
KH: Thanks, Lord. I love You.
GOD: I love you too, Son. More than you can understand.